This BetterU blog post is from…JAIME!!!
At first, I didn’t know what to write about for this week’s post. So many things were spinning around my head and I wasn’t really sure where to start, but then after reading something from one of our mentors talking about setbacks it came to me. Now that we are in week 5 of our Better U challenge I feel like I’m finally getting into my groove with getting to the gym, making meal choices that work for me and getting a bit more comfortable with being honest about what I want or need from those people around me to be successful in this program.
But….that anxiousness is back. Why you ask? Because fall baseball has started and I don’t have the schedule yet but it’s going to involve getting my boys picked up and fed before going to a field we’re not familiar with at a time when we would normally be getting home and trying to make dinner. Added to that, school is starting next week which means leaving my office early to run home and be there when my oldest gets off the school bus before we head to the day care to pick up his younger brother. There’s also religious instruction starting the week after school starts for my oldest son. My youngest, who will turn 3 in January, needs to start potty training because he’s being moved up to the pre-school program and they make more of an issue about kids being trained at that level but he has no interest.
So now, after finally getting into a groove with my eating, my workouts and having those windows of opportunity to make that happen I feel like it’s all coming undone. Those windows of opportunity feel like they are getting smaller by the day. It makes me sad and frustrated. Normally, this is where I would just throw in the towel and stop spending time on trying to do things for myself and just focus on what everyone else needs to get through new scheduling and activities. Maybe it’s the program, maybe it’s the cheerleaders I have rooting for me or maybe it’s just the stubbornness in me that is saying “how is that at all fair?”
I earned this good thing and I’ve worked so hard to come this far, so what if the schedule is tighter, I will figure it out! Why? Because I always figure it out! It’s why I’m good at my job, it’s why people come to ME for help. I’m entitled to my panic, but now that I’ve acknowledged it, all I need to do is what I’ve already done. Find the opportunities when I thought I couldn’t and reteach myself to make a new routine that still gives me the time I need to do what I need to do to feel good about me. Tough love self-talk isn’t something I usually do, but I felt the need to just put it out there this week and maybe it speaks to someone following the program or someone else in the program.
In other news, I’m very much enjoying trying out new recipes, including those that don’t include any meat at all and it’s completely rewarding to see my family enjoy them. The fact that my oldest son is trying these new meals with vegetables he may never have eaten willingly before and has raved about them truly makes my heart sing. I can’t even tell you how I felt when we were talking about making something for dinner and he asked what the serving size of it was to see if it was a good option; how amazing and such wonderful validation that my efforts are noticed!!